Dear Birth Parent,
We are Laura, Jessica, and Leo. Laura and Jessica have been a family for nearly two decades, and our son Leo joined our family in 2022. We look forward to welcoming both a new child and their birthparent into our family.
Our Values:
We believe in the value of spending time with our kiddos. We both arranged our professional lives so that we can work part-time and spend most of our time together as a family. Spending time with each other and Leo, watching him learn and grow and play, is a joy.
We also believe in the value of being active with our son, staying physically healthy and fit, reading books together, talking about our feelings, and modeling healthy and loving relationships.
We believe that all people deserve respect and love exactly as they are. We hope to teach our children, through word and example, to see and beauty the humanity of all people.
We believe that being politically active and serving in our community teaches us and helps build connection with others.
We believe that building friendships with people of many different backgrounds makes our lives richer and more beautiful. We hope to help our children seek out and build lasting friendships.
Our Family:
It really is true that it takes a village to raise a child, and we have a large and supportive “village” that loves Leo and will enthusiastically and warmly welcome a new child and a birthparent alike. Leo has 35 cousins, and those cousins have 20 kiddos of their own, so family gatherings bring quite a crowd! Our extended family is loving and goofy and sometimes irreverent and always awesome. Many of them live within half an hour of our home, while others live around the country, and a few live abroad in Canada and the UK.
We are thankful to live in a neighborhood that is beautifully diverse, with neighbors of many different races and ethnicities, many immigrant families, queer and straight families, and folks all across the economic spectrum. This wonderful community has been a gift to our family. This is important to us because Leo is one of several people of color in our broader family, with several Black and mixed-race cousins and other relatives and friends. We love and value the racial and ethnic diversity of our family and neighborhood.
Our Hope:
We hope that our child’s birthparent, and perhaps even grandparents or others, feel included in our family, if they desire that, and stay as involved as they wish and is best for all in the life of both our child and our family.
We have experienced the joy of both birth family relationships and chosen family relationships, and they have all added joy and meaning to our individual lives and our family. We welcome and hope for an ongoing relationship with our child’s birth family that brings joy and support to all.
In Closing,
We have never been in your shoes. We do not know what it feels like to carry a child to term, knowing that someone else may raise that child. We do not know your situation or your story. But we do know that you are facing decisions that are and should be yours and yours alone. One thing we both wish we had learned earlier in life is to trust ourselves in matters involving our own lives. Others, no matter how well meaning, are never in a better position than you to know what you need, want, and deserve in your life. So, dear expectant parent, whoever you are and wherever you are and whatever you have going on, trust yourself. If we meet and you become part of our lives because you decide adoption with our family is right for you, then we welcome that. If we never meet because you’re listening to and trusting a part of you that says you can and want to raise your baby, then we applaud your courage and wish you joy in your journey as a parent, with full confidence that you can do it. Whatever you decide, hang in there. We believe there is joy for you on the other side of your decision, whatever you choose.
