About two very special girls:
Our family’s adoption journey expanded in late December of 1996 when my husband, Mike, and I brought home a beautiful Filipino daughter and her darling half-brother. Maria was eight when she came to us and Ryan was 14 months old.
One of the first people outside of family that Maria met was Kathy and Dieter Kunkel’s daughter, McKenzie. Kenzie had joined her family at age 6. Kenzie is Korean. Like Maria, she joined a family with Caucasian parents. Perhaps partly because these precious girls were adopted transracially and are close in age they became fast friends. Definitely, their personalities clicked. They are both strong willed and determined women with a lot of energy.
During the grade school years, we had joint shopping ventures and sleep overs. One night the girls slept in Maria’s large walk in closet. At about 1:00 a.m. they decided that hot chocolate sounded good. Dad convinced them otherwise and suggested that they go back to bed. There were cooking adventures (and messes in the kitchen) home-work assignments and day dreaming about the future.
When they were little girls we had Barbie dolls of various races for them to play with…and a big wooden house for the dolls to live in. There were brunette Barbies, blond Barbies, brown Barbies and oriental dolls with black hair and a Polynesian Barbie. We celebrated the beautiful differences and similarities between these petite girls. They both could be described as “girly, girls” who enjoy experimenting with hair styles, make up and fashion.
The girls enjoyed “daddy daughter dates” with our church youth with their dads. There were school fairs and field trips. We enjoyed family trips to Disneyland and the Beach. Our two families went on a vacation to Southern California together one year. The girls looked forward to Halloween days, dressing up always being a favorite activity. Roller skating and bikes to ride around the neighborhood were favorites.
I remember taking them to a haunted house. It was Maria’s first experience with this particular tradition and her big sister Miranda went in after her when we could hear Maria screaming. Something had touched her arm, and out Maria and Kenzie came running. I don’t know about Kenzie, but Maria has never been in a haunted anything since.
Middle School brought with it new challenges, growth and interest in boys. We live in an area with a lot of Caucasian people and fewer numbers of people of different races. There were two Caucasian boys who would join arms and try to block the girls from passing them in the hallway at school. One day, Kenzie and Maria charged right through them and continued on their way. These boys did not really know what ethnicity the girls were, just that they both looked oriental. They called them “the mean Japanese girls” thereafter. Okay boys, you might want to study up on people of various oriental backgrounds. We still laugh about that today.
Then the High School years began. Each girl had individual interests and abilities but the friendship still flourished. Through academics, hair styling, art classes, cheerleading, dating and spending time with each other, and other friends, they grew up.
Kenzie and Maria are each married now to nice young men. This picture was taken recently at a movie theater. Both families were having “girls’ night out” at one of the Twilight movies. We all ran into each other there. Here are our beautiful girls all grown up. Now, Kenzie is a mom to a two month old baby boy. Her adventure as a mom is beginning.
Sometimes it seems like yesterday when we were working with the girls on book reports and Maria wore braces on her teeth; such fun and so many wonderful memories. What would we have done without our smart, darling girls who are now bright, independent women?
If you are adopting, your journey is just beginning; it doesn’t end when you are placed with a child. If you are an adoptive parent you know from experience what I mean by that.
I hope you have much joy in your journey!
Cindy Bylund
Education Specialist
A Act of Love Adoptions