Having an open adoption creates a lifelong relationship between adopted child and birthparents.
A young unmarried couple found themselves with an unexpected pregnancy five years ago. They wrestled with the decision on whether to get married and raise the child together or place the baby for adoption. After weeks of agonizing, they decided that given their circumstances which included a volatile relationship and some debilitating anxiety issues with the birthfather, their relationship would not last in a marriage. They decided it would be best to place the baby for adoption.
One thing they wanted more than anything was an open adoption where they could build a relationship with the adoptive couple and the child. They were shown profiles and knew almost immediately the couple that was “right” for their baby girl. The birthfather’s parents were very supportive of the adoption plan but the birthmother’s parents believed that marrying and raising the child was the best option.
As the baby arrived, both families congregated at the hospital and met the adoptive parents. It was a very emotional time for all. The birthmother struggled with emotion after birth, believing adoption was the best, yet experiencing all the feelings of bonding with the baby. When the time came to relinquish parental rights, both birthmother and father knew it was best to place. They signed the papers but were promised they would continue to see her.
The adoptive couple stayed true to their word. They kept in touch and would extend invitations to the birthparents on special occasions. As time went on, the birthparents went separate ways and the birthmother was married to someone else. This did not hinder the openness of the adoption. Both birthmother and birthfather were invited to attend events associated with their daughter they placed for adoption.
As the birthmother started having problems in her marriage, she took a step back from the adoption openness. The birthfather, however, continued to stay in close contact. A picture was posted by the birthfather recently on Facebook with the birthfather and his mother (biological grandmother) attending a dance recital of their sweet little girl. They both agree that this has been a wonderful experience where they get to be a part of her life, yet know that she has wonderful parents and a family that cherishes, nourishes and loves her with all their heart.
Open adoption is a blessing in so many lives that it touches. Not only is it helpful for the birthparents, but for their parents and families and for the adoptive parents and their families. It is probably the best blessing to the adopted child. He or she can experience knowing and learning from all family members who love them. In most cases, open adoption is a healthy and beautiful experience.
For more information on open adoption, contact an adoption agency in your area. Adoption agency professionals can help you make a plan that is best for you, whether you are a birthparent or adoptive parent. The information is free and confidential. You will find the best scenario for your situation and the agency will help you on your journey whether you are looking to adopt a child or place a baby for adoption.